The trouble with Harry

In these days of ubiquitous camera phones and infotainment, it was not surprising that when Prince Harry dropped his pants, he was snapped in the buff for posterity.  What was shocking were reports that, the entertainment site, paid $10,000 for the first two pictures it published. Only $10,000? Candid shots of royal private parts are not very marketable, it seems, despite their rarity value. The Sun was the only leading English newspaper to publish the pictures. The moderation shown by the rest of the press which reported, not displayed, the graphic details of Prince Hal’s indiscretions confirms one thing – newspapers may be racy, juicy, newsy, sensational, but bottom-feeders we are not. We draw the line at frilly panties. If you check out the pictures on the Sun or, you will see an exposed bottom – not the prince’s, but his female partner’s; but did we show it? We did not; we are not bottom-feeders.

We may have made a mistake. For the photos bear out the old adage: “When Adam delved and Eve span, who was then the gentleman?” In the grainy pictures, the prince in the buff looked like any other man. Just why the unidentified woman was standing behind him – where she was obscured from view – when they were photographed full monty, we don’t know. But the prince knew he was on camera, for his hands covered his genitals and his face turned away. It was a very anonymous, and bashful, Prince Harry who was caught with his pants down. The royal family – all stuffed shirts and pants in public – is not amused and has been nattering away about privacy. The prince’s girlfriend, model Cressida Bonas, has taken exception too and dumped him. She was humiliated, she said, by the photos which show him giving a naked bear hug to a blonde in a Las Vegas hotel room.

Yes, whatever happened to fidelity? Really, Harry should learn from his father, Prince Charles, who – such was his love for Camilla – told her on the phone: “I’ll live in your trousers or something.” Oops, he was married to Diana at the time! But look at him now. The young adult who got into adultery has become the devoted husband of his former mistress, who laughingly told him on the phone that day that he could come back to her as “A box of Tampax, so you could just keep going”.  They are prim and proper now. There’s hope for Harry yet.

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